By now, I'm sure you've heard about the father who put what was to be his son's Christmas present -a copy of the highly-coveted video game Guitar Hero III - up for sale on eBay after he caught the boy smoking marijuana. It has been all over the 'net as people debate whether the punishment fits the crime, or the father went too far.The sale has reached a bid price of over $9,000, although there's no way to tell whether it was actually sold, or the listing was removed (the father did say that if anyone could give him a compelling reason why he shouldn't sell it, he'd take it off the market). After spending weeks trying to find the game, the father, who's reportedly an elementary school teacher, feels that he's teaching his son a lesson by not giving him the game.
Will this work? Truthfully, I doubt it. His son will probably just spend more hours at his friend's house, playing the game there, and probably smoking more pot while feeling bitter towards his dad (who may have just made $8,900 by punishing him!) I could be wrong, but somehow I don't think that causing resentment will result in a lesson learned. And judging from the sarcastic tone used in dad's listing, he's obviously looking to rub things in the boy's face. (Here are some excerpts from his listing: I will show him the auction once it is posted and we can watch it finish together. Sort of a “Father-Son bonding experience"...I am still considering getting him a game for his Nintendo. Maybe something like Barbie as the Island Princess or Dancing With the Stars. These games are in stock everywhere I go, and I know he will just love them." If this isn't a snarky, rubbing-it-in-your-face-tone, I don't know what is!
Then again, this man is a father and a school teacher, so perhaps he knows what he's doing. As he claims in the auction: "I know that rewarding bad behaviour is just asking for more of the same". True enough. However, if he did take the game off eBay, there will certainly be some pretty peeved bidders out there!
In the spirit of Christmas, hopefully dad takes the game off eBay and surprises his son with it on Christmas Day. As for the father's students, I'd think twice before attempting to pull a fast one past this guy - he's a force to be reckoned with, and certainly means business!
(Here's a link to the original listing for those who are interested in taking a peek!)
UPDATE: According to lengthy notes that "dad" wrote on this listing, he has inked a deal with his son whereby if the purchasing bidder is someone just playing a prank (which it likely is, because who in their right mind would pay nine-grand?) then he'll give him the game. If it's a legitimaate bidder, they'll discuss a philanthropic way to spend the earned cash. If nothing else, hopefully the incident wil bring father and son closer. (And so many think that technology spreads people further apart!)
Will this work? Truthfully, I doubt it. His son will probably just spend more hours at his friend's house, playing the game there, and probably smoking more pot while feeling bitter towards his dad (who may have just made $8,900 by punishing him!) I could be wrong, but somehow I don't think that causing resentment will result in a lesson learned. And judging from the sarcastic tone used in dad's listing, he's obviously looking to rub things in the boy's face. (Here are some excerpts from his listing: I will show him the auction once it is posted and we can watch it finish together. Sort of a “Father-Son bonding experience"...I am still considering getting him a game for his Nintendo. Maybe something like Barbie as the Island Princess or Dancing With the Stars. These games are in stock everywhere I go, and I know he will just love them." If this isn't a snarky, rubbing-it-in-your-face-tone, I don't know what is!
Then again, this man is a father and a school teacher, so perhaps he knows what he's doing. As he claims in the auction: "I know that rewarding bad behaviour is just asking for more of the same". True enough. However, if he did take the game off eBay, there will certainly be some pretty peeved bidders out there!
In the spirit of Christmas, hopefully dad takes the game off eBay and surprises his son with it on Christmas Day. As for the father's students, I'd think twice before attempting to pull a fast one past this guy - he's a force to be reckoned with, and certainly means business!
(Here's a link to the original listing for those who are interested in taking a peek!)
UPDATE: According to lengthy notes that "dad" wrote on this listing, he has inked a deal with his son whereby if the purchasing bidder is someone just playing a prank (which it likely is, because who in their right mind would pay nine-grand?) then he'll give him the game. If it's a legitimaate bidder, they'll discuss a philanthropic way to spend the earned cash. If nothing else, hopefully the incident wil bring father and son closer. (And so many think that technology spreads people further apart!)
17 comments:
well hes more lenient than i would have ben
id have forced my son to burn the damn game and guitar and make him watch it
but its all good
I think the old saying is two wrongs do not make a right. He went over board, Think about what yu are teaching him??? Perhaps taking the game away fopr awhile and having him earn it back with maybe taking some drug stest to ensure he is clean, might do the trick, but to sell a christmas present that you got him for Christmas Totally not cool and wrong.
The 2 neer do wells, Dad calls the police for tresspass...and all three go to jail for pot smoking......much easier than messing with pay pal.
And its Dad's money so Dad get's to decide what goes on in and around Dad's house
I think there is nothing wrong with what this father did. I do not see anything wrong with smoking pot, however, if a father does not agree with his underage son doing so, I believe it is within his right to punish him by selling a video game. It's not like he put his son's text books on auction...
I never laid a hand on any of my kids but none of them ever did drugs...and they all knew my rules had teeth. They are all grown up now with a strong ethic, no psychological scars, and families of their own.
But hat it been my son!
1- HE WOULD HAVE CLEARLY KNOWN THAT
in a case involving illegal substances
IT WOULD HAVE BEEN CAUSE FOR A MAJOR CONFERENCE IN THE WOOD SHED.
MY HOUSEHOLD, MY RULES. Screw the pussy laws who think behavior modification is a DON'T DO IT AGAIN warning with no real consequences to back it up
I would have gotten out of him, WHO SOLD HIM THE STUFF & GONE AFTER THEM
Love all you want but when the
SAFETY AND THE INTEGRITY OF FAMILY MEMBERS IS AT RISK
FEAR OF CONSEQUENCES IS A DAMNED
GOOD BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION TOOL
There is absolutely NO debate here. The father was absolutely right for doing what he did. His house, his rules...like them or not!!
I hope this kid has learned not to mess with the bull....
big deal, he took away his game. what a bunch of cry-babies. how are parents supposed to discipline/punish their kids? he's too old for a beating, to young/dumb for a seriours talk. it's time to learn that actions have consequences. if it was me, i'd leave the game, but sell/take away his console.
and at this age kids should have a job, this way they can buy their own games, learn value of money, and have less time for pot smoking.
It's great to hear that all parent,s are not obediant to their children as this is the cause of great moral decline in what use to be a great Country
So Simple,
Christmas is a time for giving.
A parent has the choice of gifts to give, and may choose a bigger gift to the well deserving child.
In this case, the child was obviously not deserving, and the parent got rid of the gift he had purchased, and even made a profit on it....Bonus.
Son, respect your father, if you gone experiment with the weed, don't do it on your father's property cause he doesn't approve...
Now be nice to him, and hopefully he will use some of the winnings to assist you in your many future needs.
Stefcat
It wasn't the kid's Guitar Hero III. He hadn't been given it.
The kid had no *right* to receive Guitar Hero III as a Christmas gift. Gifts are entirely at the discretion of the giver, by definition.
So no, no harm, no foul.
I like to smoke the ocasional joint myself. Though clearly the father was never in the wrong here.
I would have sold the gaming console too.
We are raising children in a different world than the one we grew up in, where you respected anyone older than you, even if you knew deep inside they were an ass.
No, dad didn't go too far. This isn't about the definition of a gift or whether two wrongs make a right. The father has an obligation to teach his son right from wrong. As a society we seem to have lost sight of that.
Was the father completely within his rights to sell the game... absolutely... he paid for it.
Will the father get the change in behaviour he wants... I think strong armed tactics may work well with younger kids... which is probably why this elementary school teacher dad thinks it's a good idea... but with teenagers... get ready for the backlash... I have a feeling this one might be HUGE. teenagers will plot
The son is old enough to know he was doing something wrong. A parent's job is to teach our children that there are consequences for our actions. I agree with selling the game - but I'd donate the money to drug rehabilitation programs as that is what started the whole issue.
Parents today are far to forgiving. The result is a society where kids are growing up with an "Entitlement" mentality. Dad did his part - I'm proud of him.
A similar thing happened with my daughter. I had recently bought her a car then caught her breaking the no illegal drugs rule as well as a few others.
Guess what, she no longer has a car it is now mine. I told her that she had the freedom to do whatever she wanted but if she did something we told her not to do or obviously disaproved of, it impacted our relationship negatively. That means that I am unhappy and I will act like I am unhappy with her. Since buying a car for a child is something you do to reward her or beacause you want her to be happy she is inelligible for it if I am not happy with her. So obviously I support this father 100%. Just in case you were wondering so does my daughter.
Wow. I can't believe some people. All those people out there saying selling the game was too harsh. I know if my Dad caught me, he'd kick my ass so hard I wouldn't be able to walk, then he'd rip all the electronics out my room. No wonder there's so many little snots out there these days, their parents are too pussy for a little punishment.
For all the parents who support this guy's choice, way to go. And to the kids who think this is unfair, then don't smoke in your own damn house! How stupid can you get?
For the record, I'm 16.
No need to discuss what the purpose of christmas is or how wrong marijauna is, the father is simply trying to raise his kid with HIS values but the way in which he does it will cause negative consequences and there were smarter alternative disciplinary actions he could have taken.
CONSEQUENCES:
- the kid has only learned not to get caught by his dad since he associates that punishment with getting caught. he will continue to do it behind his dad's back.
- parents should be ppl who we can talk to, lean on, and ask questions about this confusing world (my belief). but now if the kid ever has questions about drugs from the experience of using it or needs someone to lean on because he's hooked on it, he feels he can't go to his parents because doing so will reveal that he did what he was told not to do and all he will think he will get out of talking with them even out of desperation will be punishment, not care.
- by this age (the kid), fear is no longer the best means of shaping the kids behaviour. imagine all the ppl that have imposed their beliefs onto you. how does that make you? do you not want to just get away from them because they threaten your identity. do you not want to just have nothing to do with them? that's what's going to happen to the son-dad relationship.
BETTER ALTERNATIVE:
- father must communicate two things first:
(1) that he is not supportive of smoking marijuana
(2) that obedience is what he expects within a father-son relationship
- father should clearly explain all the pros and cons of smoking marijuana, be open to questioning, and communicate to the kid in a way that shows that he is doing it all out of care, not out of trying to make his life miserable
- let the explanation of the cons be the punishment for taking marijuana but punishment for disobeying father be separate. if a loving relationship is already established, the hurt reaction of father for his son disobeying him and hurting himself would be the "punishment".. depending on the kids age, fear is not an effective punisher
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